I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
