we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
