oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
