can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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