it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
