One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize