bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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