Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I just gift wrapped bread.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
