Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
