dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I came so hard my ears popped.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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