i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize