The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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