I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
