nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Buhtt sex?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
