Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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