She is in my trunk
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
