it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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