I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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