How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
