pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
