i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I could fuck to npr.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
