Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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