yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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