Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
