i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
