Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You dont lie about slip and slides
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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