Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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