I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
