if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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