I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
drinking out of a sandbucket again
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize