I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
She needs sedatives and a leash
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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