Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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