Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Randomize