you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
