i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
