yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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