I'm really into asian looking animals
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
