Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I need a burrito and a hug.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
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