i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Randomize
