I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
