Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize