I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
