I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
