well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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