i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Randomize
