Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
