Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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