Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Girls should come with a carfax report
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
