party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
