I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Your mouth is God's brothel.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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